The 'what if'

With every experience we carry the burden of 'what if'. What if I look bad? What if they remember that thing I did or said? What if no one likes me? What if I fail? Like a circling predator the 'what if' is always close by, lurking. Very rarely does the 'what if' have a positive spin in these moments. What if I win? What if they all love me? What if everything goes perfectly? And on those few occasions when that positive 'what if' makes it through,

the predator swiftly closes in. What if I win and they all hate me for it? What if they like me but I hate them? What if I gain the world and lose my soul? Much like water our mind is fluid. A simple thought is the drop that begins the cascade of emotions and what i call,''chain-thinking". One thought giving birth to another, growing and devouring the dream, capsizing the will.